“Father Abraham: Fightin’ Protector Man”
Father’s Day June 19, 2005 Genesis 14
What a Riot - To Serve & Protect
The front page of last Saturday’s KW Record newspaper featured an intimidating pose by the regional police department’s “public safety unit” or ‘riot squad’. As members of the public, we appreciate feeling secure and protected, assured that protesters aren’t going to be allowed to turn violent and destructive. We pay our police forces to ensure a degree of safety, we want to know we can trust that someone’s got things under control. The sergeant said, “We have to show them [protesters] that at the end of the day, we are the ones who decide their actions.”
However not all the riots and unrest occur out in the street or at public demonstrations. Many homes are invisible battlegrounds these days, particularly as parents become more fragmented and intimidated. The type of conflict police most dread is the domestic dispute. Father’s Day reminds us that the lack of fathers in particular is causing more and more problems in North American society. Roland Warren (New Man May/June 2005) reports that one out of every 3 children in the United States is growing up in a home in which their father does not live. “Children who live absent their biological fathers are, on average, at least 2-3 times more likely to be poor, to use drugs, to experience educational, health, emotional and behavioural problems, to be victims of child abuse and to engage in criminal behaviour than their peers who live with their married, biological (or adoptive) parents...Fatherless children are twice as likely to drop out of school. A study of adolescents charged with murder found that 7/10 grew up without their fathers. Children in single-parent homes have a 120% greater risk of being endangered by some type of child abuse. Adolescent females between the ages of 15 and 19 years reared in homes without fathers are significantly more likely to engage in premarital sex...” What a list of social woes! Maybe if we addressed the father vacuum more, we wouldn’t need riot squads so much.
The Bible holds up for us examples of men like Abraham who didn’t use anti-riot gear but had a positive, safety-providing impact on their surroundings. And Scripture reminds us that our Awesome God is the very best Father of all, serving and protecting us.
In some churches it’s frowned upon to talk of God as Father or in any male terms. Such language is seen as “exclusive” to women and problematic for any who’ve been hurt or abused by their human fathers (which is, sadly, too common). But the Bible doesn’t shy away from using male imagery to describe God (although God is beyond just one gender and a few references do use female imagery). Those of us with fathers can relate the best of their qualities to the Father of mankind (Eph 3:14f; 4:6). If you suffered due to your human father’s mistreatment, or didn’t know an earthly father, God says He’ll receive us when even our own parents forsake us (Ps 27:10). He’s the father you never had, or the best father you ever had.
The Father language about God throughout Scripture carries many meaningful connotations. He’s our Maker and Creator: Isaiah (64:8) says, “Yet, O LORD, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” He’s our Provider: Jesus said, “...how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” (Mt 7:11) He’s our Corrector, disciplining us for our good, as Proverbs 3:12 relates: “the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.” Psalm 103(13) says, “As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him...” Paul, who suffered so much for his faith, refers to God as “the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our afflictions...” (2Cor 1:4) God calls us away from idols to be His very own people, His living temple, as 2Cor 6(18) says, “"I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."” We mentioned God is the father some people never had. Psalm 68(5f) calls Him “Father of the fatherless and protector of widows...God gives the desolate a home to dwell in.”
So whatever else we say about fathering today, the Bible makes no apologies for pointing us back to God Almighty as the Father par excellence, the original “daddy” human fathers can take lessons from.
Paul refers to Abraham as a sort of faith-father to all who believe. Genesis 14 isn’t found in the lectionary, but it’s just the kind of story guys would like. Stirring, exciting, like Rob Roy or William Wallace in Braveheart taking on the British. Good-guy Spiderman saving New York from the Green Goblin, or short stuff Peter Parker overcoming the big meanie in the hallway. John Eldredge in Wild at Heart writes, “A man must have a battle to fight, a great mission to his life that involves and yet transcends even home and family. He must have a cause to which he is devoted even unto death, for this is written into the fabric of his being.” Men in their youth, at least in their imagination, crave a battle, to fight for the right, to trounce enemies and protect those dear to them. Boys will play at it with sticks for guns or swords; grown teens flirt with danger by driving fast cars or bungee- or pier-jumping. There’s something about masculinity that’s ‘ready to rumble’ for what’s right.
Picture the setting – scroll back the timeline to 21 centuries before Christ. There’s no United Nations, no RCMP, no riot squads to protect the innocent. The mid-east consists of various tribes with their chieftain leaders, banding together in alliances; mightier kings conquer lesser ones and make them pay tribute. It’s like a game of Settlers but in real-life! For some of you, that sounds scarey, but to the scrappers and go-getters, that sounds like opportunity.
Well, one king in particular (Kedorlaomer or ‘Special K’) had succeeded in banding together with 3 others (we’ll call it the Fearsome Foursome) and subjugating several of the surrounding tribes, from Damascus down to the south end of the Dead Sea. Five of these conquered tribes had put up with this for a dozen years but then rebelled (we’ll call them the Feisty Five, including Gomorrah and Sodom where Abraham’s nephew Lot lived). Special K didn’t take to kindly to them stepping on the hose of his wine supply, so rallied his allies and proceeded on a very effective clean-up tour of his southern holdings. The Feisty Five were shown a thing or two, including the folly of trying to escape at high speed through an area riddled with gooey tar pits. In true Age of Empires form, the Fearsome Foursome helped themselves to as much booty as they could carry (including Lot and his family) and headed for home to enjoy the spoils of despotic sovereignty.
This is where the story gets good. Abram, after graciously allowing greedy nephew Lot to get the lusher part of the deal and take the fertile plain of the Jordan for his flocks, had settled down about 20 miles south of Jerusalem, and made allies with a few friendly neighbourhood Amorites. He still had no son at this point, and perhaps was a little puzzled at being over 75 years old but having been promised by God he’d become a great nation. For now, Lot was his nearest next-of-kin. When Abe found out Lot and all were captured, he rallied some 318 fellows in his private security force, and with his allies’ help took off in pursuit of the Fearsome Foursome. What spunk! What courage! Special K’s troops had trounced and humiliated the forces of five tribes, and here little wandering Abraham was taking him on to rescue his nephew. How many of us would have been saying to ourselves, “Serves Lot right for settling so close to that wicked city of Sodom!” Or, “He took the best share of the whole countryside and left me the marginal areas – let’s see how he enjoys slavery for a while!” But that wasn’t Abraham’s style. With God’s help, he succeeded where multiple kings and armies had failed.
There are 7 steps in Abraham’s victory that fathers today would do well to imitate. First, in v14, “Abram heard that his relative had been taken captive...” It MATTERED to him. Abraham noticed what was going on, he wasn’t too busy, or preoccupied with business, counting his sheep or fine-tuning the carburetor on his prize-winning racing camel to get a few more miles per hour out of it. He took note of what had happened. As dads, we need to pay attention to what’s going on in our families lives and be ready to get involved.
Second, also in v14, “he called out the 318 trained men born in his household...” He MUSTERED his troops, drew out the resources that were there waiting to be deployed. Part of our role as dads is to call forth from our offspring their individual strengths and unique abilities. Although it’s nice to give our kids an allowance, we shouldn’t feel like we have to pay them like a hired worker before we ask them to help out with a household chore or try learning a new skill. Often it’s when a child applies themselves to various tasks that they discover their talents, what they enjoy doing and are gifted for. This calls for some nerve on dad’s part, being willing to get in Junior’s face (in a nice way) to get them moving on the task at hand. Don’t just let it go and say, “I’ll do it myself.” They need to learn and be stretched to tackle new things.
Robert Lewis says a real man rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and expects God’s greater reward. Abraham noticed what was happening and didn’t sit back but mustered his troops.
Third, he “went in pursuit as far as Dan” some 120 miles north, well past the Sea of Galilee. He MOTORED, he got moving, he launched into action and stuck with it. He didn’t let up until the task was done.
Has anyone noticed there’s a lot of driving involved with parenting these days? We motor with our kids. Fathers can redeem this driving time, using the opportunity to talk about all kinds of things, including spiritual matters, with your offspring. Roland Warren writes, “The key difference between the nurturing dad and the breadwinner dad is the nurturing dad is also a ‘heart-winner’ who is involved in the day-to-day care of his children - everything from changing diapers, to reading to their children at bedtime, to taking the kids to the doctor, to driving the kids to school every morning...[Such] fathers are able to be more spiritually involved in their children’s lives...One of the most important things a father can do for his children is to communicate values to them, and the nurturing dad is in a great position to carry out this vital fathering task.” So – motor with them, use that driving time to be involved personally and spiritually.
Fourth, v15, Abram MARSHALLED his resources effectively against the foe: “during the night” (taking advantage of cover of darkness, since his forces were far fewer in number) he “divided his men” (a strategic, creative move) “to attack them and he routed them”. Fathering requires marshalling our resources for the benefit of those who depend on us. That means saying no to things we once did as adolescents, or before we had children. That means discipline with our datebook so we’re not working 70 hours a week and missing their events or not having suppers together. You can’t do everything; your responsibility to your family outweighs sometimes professional advancement or the demands of peers. Abram only had so many men and he deployed them in ways that were most effective. That means we may need to be tough and disciplined with ourselves, in our lifestyle choices. Jesus said, “The kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and violent men take it by force.” (Mt 11:12) John Eldredge comments, “Contrast it with this: ‘The kingdom of heaven is open to passive, wimpy men who enter it by lying on the couch watching TV.’” We need to marshal our resources, as disciplined disciples.
Fifth, v16, Abram “recovered all the goods and brought back his relative Lot and his possessions, together with the women and the other people.” He MINISTERED to his family, bringing Lot back, saving him from torture or death or lifelong slavery. How can we help our kids be recovered, restored? Am I using my energy to build them up, help them with their math or their clutch-grinding or that project? Ministering involves serving my wife and children, doing what’s in their best interests. Do they need encouragement in an area they’re struggling with? Am I allowing them to try new things, master new skills, to make mistakes – then do I ream them out or gently correct and encourage them to try again?
Anne Graham Lotz, Ruth & Billy Graham’s daughter, tells of smashing her mother’s little VW a week after her 17th birthday, on the way to the baccalaureate service where her father was the guest speaker. She asked her neighbour not to tell her parents. At the service, Billy looked straight at her then said to everybody that she had never cause him any problems, and that she had been a joy to her mother and himself. When Ann returned home later that day, she recalls: “My father was standing right inside with his piercing blue eyes directed straight toward me. I paused for a moment, then ran to my father and threw my arms around his neck! As I clung to him, I sobbed: ‘Daddy, I’m so sorry. If you just knew what I’d done you never would have said all those nice things about me.’ I told him about my wreck – how I’d driven way too fast...As I clung to him and wept on his shoulder, he said four things to me that taught me life’s lesson about my relationship with my heavenly Father: ‘1) Anne, I knew all along about your wreck. I was just waiting for you to tell me. 2) I love you. 3) We can fix the car. 4) You are going to be a better driver because of this.’” Billy ministered to his daughter at a fragile moment; and she learned from that she can run to her Heavenly Father and throw her arms of faith around Him and confess her sin when she gets hurt or someone else does. Rather than run away, or try to hide, or avoid Him, or deny responsibility, or rationalize our behaviour.
Sixth, Abraham MAGNIFIED God and so became a MODEL in worship. Upon his return, he’s met by the king of Sodom along with this Melchizedek (‘king of righteousness’) in v18; this priest-king of Salem (Jerusalem) has brought out a meal of bread and wine, and blesses Abram, and ‘God Most High’ for delivering the enemies into Abram’s hand. In response, Abram gives ‘a tenth of everything’ to this mysterious figure who’s a type or foreshadowing of Jesus. Abram magnified or worshipped God by presenting an offering, accepting the blessing, and taking part in the ritual meal celebration.
Christian fathers likewise ought to model worship and a living walk with God for their families. Keep acknowledging that it’s God who has overcome your enemies for you, not your own strength or smartness. Take your children to Sunday School and church, don’t just drop them off and pick them up after: your failure to attend is sending a far stronger message. Find a good family devotional resource for some reflective time together after supper each day.
Roland Warren notes, “Fatherhood is really a priesthood. And it’s critical that dads affirm their kids’ spirits by setting a moral compass deep within their children’s souls. This is more than enforcing rules or making sure that your kids have memorized the Ten Commandments. As Josh McDowell says, ‘Rules without relationships yield rebellion.’ This is about dad being a spiritual leader and a role model who sets a godly example in word and deed that his children are compelled to follow.”
Finally, Abraham MASTERED his own desires and learned self-restraint. The king of Sodom offered to let Abraham keep the goods he’d rescued for himself. But Abram replies in vv22f, “I...have taken an oath that I will accept nothing belonging to you, not even a thread or the thong of a sandal, so that you will never be able to say, ‘I made Abram rich.’” (Ge 14:22f) Contrast this with easy-going Lot’s willingness to take the best part even though he deserved less (13:10f). Abraham curbed any natural greediness and was resolute in his intent not to claim anything for himself. He disciplined himself so as not to get at all indebted or “beholden” to the wicked king of Sodom, but so he could remain free to serve God alone.
Eldredge notes, “A man will devote long hours to his finances when he has a goal of an early retirement; he’ll endure rigorous training when he aims to run a 10k or even a marathon. The ability to discipline himself is there, but dormant for many of us. ‘When a warrior is in service, however, to a True King – that is, to a transcendent cause,’ says Bly, ‘he does well, and his body becomes a hard-working servant, which he requires to endure cold, heat, pain, wounds, scarring hunger, lack of sleep, hardship of all kinds, do what is necessary.’” Abraham MASTERED himself to be serve the Lord.
Cassandra Lindell, a writer in Portland Oregon, shares this story that highlights God’s fatherhood as a reflection of a loving earthly father.
It had been a hot, tiring day at the outdoor music festival. 4-year-old Tommy sat in my lap with his head resting against my chest. His mother had taken his brother to find a drink of water. His father was packing up the display booth. Tommy and I went to find a quiet place on the stairs behind a building. He was sleepy and cuddly, and his droopy eyes looked at the stars. “How did the stars get up there?” he asked. “God put them there.” “My dad told me that. But God died.” Tommy sounded very sad but I had to smile. “Yes, He did. And then He came back to life again.” “Oh yeah. I always forget that part.” He was very serious as he studied the night sky.
Then he asked where his dad was. I said he was putting things in boxes to take to the car. “I miss him,” he told me. Tommy wasn’t speaking as a child whose father was never around. I knew these friends well, and his dad spent lots of time with his boys – laughing, loving , and teaching. His influence was easy to see. Little Tommy missed his dad because he was so used to being with him.
So Tommy and I sat, looking at the stars. We talked about being lonely. “But you know,” I said, “even when your daddy and mommy aren’t here, God is always here.” Tommy was quiet. I thought for just a moment that he may have fallen asleep. Then, very softly and still looking at the sky, he said, “If God was my daddy, I’d have the best daddy in the whole world.” Again, I smiled. “He is your father, Tommy. He’s the Father in heaven who loves you very much – even more than your daddy does, and He promises He’ll never leave you.” “Oh yeah,” Tommy said “I forgot that part too.”
As he finally drifted off to sleep, I sat looking at the stars alone. I thought about 2 fathers – both of them the best daddies a boy could have – laughing, loving, and teaching. Their influence was indeed easy to see.
Let’s pray.