In Memoriam - Sharon Miller

Feb.2/03 Ps.23; 103:13-17; Rom.5:1-11; Jn.6:35,37-40

Death's Intrusion

At this time of year, it's a bit hard to picture grass and flowers, because any outdoors are buried deep under the snow. The lush greenery and beautiful blossoms of last summer are but a distant memory, they've long since died, faded, and been covered up. Scripture reminds us that our physical nature is subject to the same fragility and temporariness that is so evident in outdoor vegetation. Ps.103 says, "As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more."

        For both daisy and damsel, death intrudes upon our existence. It's part of life in this fallen order, just as summer and winter are a routine part of our Canadian experience. Ever since Adam and Eve sinned, death comes to all creation; there's no avoiding it. Even the dearly-loved Psalm 23 speaks of death as a "valley" through which we someday must walk on life's journey; there's no avoiding it. For some people it comes at the end of a long and satisfying life; for many others, though, it seems to interrupt brashly and cut short the length of time we've come to expect. In Sharon's case, at just 50 years old, it seems to have butted in prematurely.

        It's very understandable that we might react sadly or even angrily to Sharon's death. As a mother, grandmother, sister, and friend, she will be sorely missed. I'm told she was a beautiful person, strong and youthful; when healthy she enjoyed dancing and karaoke. She did a good job of raising five children largely on her own, and was very proud of her kids. She loved her plants and was a very nurturing person, for her older kids more like a big sister than a mom. It was sad to see cancer invade her life and steal years that we would have enjoyed her company. Premature death is exasperating, infuriating. Yet death will come to all of us some day, it's just a matter of time. We're not angels but mortals; life seems short no matter how long we have.

        From peasant to prime minister, roughian to royalty, death intrudes upon all of us; it's no distinguisher of persons, there's no avoiding it. The last words of so great a monarch as Queen Elizabeth I were these: "O my God! It is over. I have come to the end of it - the end, the end. To have only one life, and to have done with it! To have lived, and loved, and triumphed, and now to know it is over! One may defy everything else but this."

Rejoice in Sufferings?

In the face of death's intrusion, we can rant and rave and scream and shake our fist in its face, even get downright mad at our Creator and resentful of all the disease and disorders that He's allowed to infest this world as a consequence of the sin of us and our forebears, but in the long run that's not all that helpful. Yes we grieve the loss of someone who was part of our life. But the experience, courage, and hope of people in the pages of Scripture, and even those in our own past such as Sharon, suggest there is another way to respond to death's dealing. Paul who was martyred could write of rejoicing in his sufferings. How? What good can we get from life's injuries and disappointments? He wrote, "We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." Paul saw that God could bring about His purpose for our personal growth through the hardship.

        At times we feel knocked down, out for the count because of what's happened. We're weak and powerless, had the stuffing knocked out of us. But it's then that by turning to God instead of against Him, God's Holy Spirit comes and pours reassurance of God's love into our hurting hearts. How does this work? Paul explains, "At just the right time, when we were still powerless" - still bound in our sin - "Christ died for the ungodly...God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

        Death is not the end of existence. Scripture emphasizes that we will all someday be judged for our deeds while alive. Jesus came in order that we need not fear judgment, but trusting in Him find forgiveness for our sins and the miracle of eternal life with God. In the supreme example of love, Jesus was other-centred, He gave up His life to pay for our shortcomings and save us from hell. He said, "I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me.And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day.For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."

        Jesus defied death by refusing to do His own will and instead doing God's will, to raise up from death those who commit their lives to Him. We see an echo of that sacrificial love in the way Sharon put others first. Family members I talked to seemed to all be singing the same song about Sharon's other-centredness: "She would've given the shirt off her back...she put everybody ahead of herself, she was more concerned about others...She worried about others more than herself, especially the grandkids..."

        To die is normal, unavoidable in this fallen order. What raises us above just physical existence is learning to follow Jesus in choosing to give up our lives for others, loving and helping them and He in love died in our place to save us.

Live for the lasting Home, not the Inn

In this life, winter comes and kills the outdoor plants. But to Jesus this life is just a dot at the beginning of a line that can go on forever. He calls us to live for the line, not just the dot. Before he died he explained to the disciples that He was going to get another dwelling ready for them. He said, "In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you.I am going there to prepare a place for you.And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." (John 14:2-3) He's gone ahead to make space for us in a new home with God, where believers will enjoy true goodness, life, and peace that we can barely imagine on earth.

        One thing Sharon cared strongly about was the condition her place was in. I'm told she was a very independent person and took a healthy pride in managing her appearance and her home. Near the end, even though she was very ill, she'd still get up and do some housework so the place would be presentable when the homemaker came! Well, Jesus is just such a nurturer and caregiver, too. He's gone ahead to prepare our eternal home - if we can only trust Him and obey Him during our short stay on this planet. Psalm 23 talks of God "preparing a table before me"; "I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

        Thomas Watson commented thus on the death of Christians: "The world is a great inn, where we are to stay a night or two, and be gone; what madness is it to set our heart upon our inn, as to forget our home." Death will come, yes; but praise God, He's provided a better place and joyful reunion with those who love Him when this age's grass and flowers are but a distant memory. "The wind blows over [the grass] and it is gone...but from everlasting to everlasting the Lord's love is with those who fear Him, and His righteousness with their children's children." (Ps.103:17) Let's pray.